Trick or Treat! You Need to Learn These 20 Corny Halloween Jokes

Need to tickle a skeleton’s funny bone? These corny Halloween jokes should do the trick.

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Halloween jokes - lonely skeleton sitting on chair
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Halloween Jokes Anyone Can Remember!

Q: Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?
A: They have no body to love.

Q: Know why skeletons are so calm?
A: Because nothing gets under their skin.

Q: How do vampires get around on Halloween?
A: On blood vessels.

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Corny Halloween jokes - Ghost boo
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A Ghost Walks Into a Bar…

Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the Boos.

Q: Why did the Vampire read The New York Times?
A: He heard it had great circulation.

Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.

Check out more silly jokes to make anyone laugh.

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Halloween candy
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Tricks and Treats

Q: Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

Q: Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A: Mali-boo.

Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.

Put your vocabulary to the test with our Halloween words quiz.

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Corny Halloween jokes - Mummy
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Mummy Dearest

Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They’re afraid to unwind.

Q: Why don’t mummies have friends?
A: They’re too wrapped up in themselves.

Q: What’s a ghoul’s favourite bean?
A: A human bean.

Check out the most haunted places in Canada (if you dare)!

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Spooky foggy cemetery
Photo: Gill Copeland /

Surreal Estate

Q: What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.

Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
A: Frostbite

Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

Q: What is in a ghost’s nose?
A: Boo-gers

Discover 13 creepy facts about Canada.

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Corny Halloween jokes - Pumpkin head
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Demons Are Forever

Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.

Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A:  It’s a pain in the neck.

Q: The maker of this product does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it. What is it?
A: A coffin.

After you’ve memorized these Halloween jokes, check out the funniest knock-knock jokes of all time!

Reader's Digest
Originally Published in Reader's Digest