Funny Father’s Day Quotes
“You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” – Jerry Seinfeld
Rita Rudner on the secret of a successful marriage
“I gave my father $100 and said, “Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.” So he went out and bought a present for my mother.”
Don’t miss this roundup of the funniest marriage jokes of all time.
Bob Odenkirk on Father’s Day gifts
“My daughter got me a ‘World’s Best Dad’ mug. So we know she’s sarcastic.”
Here are 75 funny family jokes everyone can relate to.
A knee-slapper from Stewart Francis
“Even though I’m proud my dad invented the rear-view mirror, we’re not as close as we appear.”
If your dad is Mr. Fix-It, he’ll appreciate these silly DIY jokes.
Erma Bombeck on the parental divide
“We wondered why when a child laughed, he belonged to Daddy, and when he had a sagging diaper that smelled like a landfill, ‘He wants his mother.'”
If you’re getting a kick out of these funny Father’s Day quotes, be sure to check out our roundup of the best Canadian jokes of all time.
Dave Attell on the innocence of youth
“When you’re young, you think your dad is Superman. Then you grow up, and you realize he’s just a drunk guy who wears a cape.”
These funny good morning GIFs will start your day with a smile.
James Breakwell on a typical exchange
Four-year-old: Tell me a scary story!
Me: One time little people popped out of your mom, and they never stopped asking questions.
Four-year-old: Why?
Here are 25 knock-knock jokes that are genuinely funny!
Jon Stewart being Jon Stewart
“Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.”
These bad dad jokes are sure to make you laugh out loud.
Mark Twain on lessons learned
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant, I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
Every dad will relate to these funny parenting tweets!
John Kinnear on the miracle of parenting
“Sometimes I am amazed that my wife and I created two human beings from scratch yet struggle to assemble the most basic of IKEA cabinets.”
Next, check out 20 funny Father’s Day jokes you’ll want to share with your dad.